How July 18, 2007
Posted by Han in : Human Relationship , trackbackArguments cause a lot of stress and tension. If not handle properly relationship will suffered. Before we look into how to avoid arguments, we must first look at its cause. What causes an argument?
An argument started when 2 persons disagree with one another. Why disagree? Because there is conflicting desire meaning my desire (want) is different from yours. This is clearly stated in James 1:1-2.
What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. James 4:1-2
What are these desires?
1) It is the desire to have or to possess something.
When our possessions come under certain kind of threat we will fight and battle for it.
2) It is the desire to feel good.
When our number one priority in life is to satisfy our pleasure, there will be conflict.
3) It is the desire to be somebody.
We want to be popular and powerful. When such the desire to impress others becomes very strong in us, there will be conflict. Pride often leads to arguments.
The main cure for avoiding arguments is to be humble. God gives grace to the humble and grace is the power to change.
How to avoid arguments?
1) Give in to God.
Who is in control of your life? The starting point is to get peace inside before you get peace outside. We must submit ourselves to God.
2) Aware of the devil’s scheme.
The devil wants to make use of our desire to cause conflict with one another. He lies and deceives. He plays on our pride. His ultimate goal in causing conflict is to destroy the bond and unity among one another. We must resist the devil and he will flee from us.
3) Grow closer to God.
Learn to grow closer to God. Spend quality time with God. When we grow closer with God we can get along better with people. Try this, when we are angry, pray first.
4) Be willing to ask for forgiveness.
Apologize even when you are not wrong. It is not a matter of who’s right or wrong. The fact that there is an argument you are also partly responsible.
Do not hold on to small little thing and affect the relationship and unity.



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